After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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