Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize