he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
