quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
You left your underwear on the fireplace
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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