so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
