She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
