I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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