We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
