lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
