Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
