I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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