He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Randomize
