shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
