So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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