I think I died a long time ago.
she woke up with a sticky ear
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
