There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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