TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
