Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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