...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
