I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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