Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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