I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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