tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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