Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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