so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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