I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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