she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
