I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
