shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize
