we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
