she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Betty ford says i'm here all night
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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