everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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