I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
