I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
