She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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