you traded sex for a burrito?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
