i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
