I am in a vortex of obligation.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
