My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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