with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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