she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
