We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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