yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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