i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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