the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
