dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
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