I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize