I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
