I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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