I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
