you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
